SO true....there has been so much going on in the last month that I don't even know where to begin? The month of August was great! I got to spend lots of time with the kids and my family. We spent many days and nights swimming and really enjoying the Summer weather, before school started. I get so much joy out of watching the kids play and swim in the pool, I literally could just sit and watch them all day long. The end of August brought some changes...I decided that it was the right time to move out of the house and in with my parents. This was a hard decision, but I have always put the kids first, and realized that the transition would be easier before school started. So, we packed up everything that we wanted to have there, and moved it! What a crazy weekend that was!
It's been about 3 weeks since the move and I have to say that we all could not be happier right now. The company, the extra help with the daily routine, and food have been a blessing to me. And when I say food, I mean holy hell, the food my Mom makes on a dialy basis is insane. I will prob gain like 20 pounds living there, but I'm trying to keep that in mind.
Another perk of living with them, is that I finally get one night off during the week! On wednesday's I have started a yoga class in the evening and so far its great. I never had the opputunity to do this before, when I was on my own. I still needed to be there to care for them after school unitl my Ex came after work to ppick them up, and then had to be there when he brought them home for the night. Now I really feel like I am getting my one night off!
I have also been doing a lot of recolecting lately. I think about where I was this time last year, and I remember the pain, anger, and sadness I felt on a daily basis. It's almost like I was in some sort of depression, and looking back, I'm sure that's what it was. Today, I can't believe how I've changed, how much better I feel, how much happier I am, with my self, and where I'm at. I still have some tough times ahead, with the finalizing of the divorce, and selling the house for good, but when I think of how far I've come, I cannot help but be proud of myself.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
The tides they are a changing...
Things have been different lately. I'm not even sure how to articulate how I have been feeling these past few weeks. I feel good, nervous, excited, scared, etc. It's amazing how experiences in life can send us spinning into a cluster of feelings.
I generally feel better lately. And when I say feel better, I mean in every way. I feel better about myself, more confident, happier, and loved by the people that matter the most. I have come to realize that the bad things I have been through in the past two years has led me to where I am now. As much as it was hard, and at times, could not imagine living on my own, without that other person to counter balance my world. The thing is, I'm better off without him. I know that now. I am actually a better person, a better Mom, and a better friend without him. That says a lot I think about how our relationship was just not a good one.
I can picture a future now, just me and the kids, and I am at peace with that, and to be honest a little excited about the possibilities life can present.
I generally feel better lately. And when I say feel better, I mean in every way. I feel better about myself, more confident, happier, and loved by the people that matter the most. I have come to realize that the bad things I have been through in the past two years has led me to where I am now. As much as it was hard, and at times, could not imagine living on my own, without that other person to counter balance my world. The thing is, I'm better off without him. I know that now. I am actually a better person, a better Mom, and a better friend without him. That says a lot I think about how our relationship was just not a good one.
I can picture a future now, just me and the kids, and I am at peace with that, and to be honest a little excited about the possibilities life can present.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Words to live by
So I've added this quote to my blog, because it moves me:
"One day at a time--this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering."
--Ida Scott Taylor
This is going to be my mantra from now on. I am going to try and let go of the grief and pain I feel from the past year and half, and live in the present. Every day I will try hard to live like its my last, and love my kids with with every ounce of me, and make sure they know it!
These words really make me think about life and how I want to live mine. Free from pain, hurt and anger, and all the negative thoughts that come along. I know I have it in me to be a better person, and not let these feelings take control. I will not, I will not let them.
This past weekend as I was driving home from spending an awesome weekend with my sister, I started remembering where I was last year at this time, how awful I felt all the time, how sad i felt 24 hrs a day, and then it hit me like a flash of lightning! This summer is already so much better than last summer. It's like I could suddenly see the light at the end of tunnel, and all the progress I've made. I know I'm not there yet, and may be I will never be, and that's ok, but the thought that I was in a much better place than I was last year at this time is something to celebrate! I have had so much more fun these last few months, and have felt so much better physically and emotionally than I did last year, that I know I'm headed in the right direction. Baby steps, it just takes baby steps, and celebrate the accomplishments you make with each step.
I am starting to feel better, I'm starting to get some of my confidence and self esteem back and I know its because I have the best family anyone could ask for holding me up, making sure I don't fall, and loving me unconditionally. Without these people, I would not have made it this far. Here's to hoping next year is even better than this one!!!!
Cheers!
"One day at a time--this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering."
--Ida Scott Taylor
This is going to be my mantra from now on. I am going to try and let go of the grief and pain I feel from the past year and half, and live in the present. Every day I will try hard to live like its my last, and love my kids with with every ounce of me, and make sure they know it!
These words really make me think about life and how I want to live mine. Free from pain, hurt and anger, and all the negative thoughts that come along. I know I have it in me to be a better person, and not let these feelings take control. I will not, I will not let them.
This past weekend as I was driving home from spending an awesome weekend with my sister, I started remembering where I was last year at this time, how awful I felt all the time, how sad i felt 24 hrs a day, and then it hit me like a flash of lightning! This summer is already so much better than last summer. It's like I could suddenly see the light at the end of tunnel, and all the progress I've made. I know I'm not there yet, and may be I will never be, and that's ok, but the thought that I was in a much better place than I was last year at this time is something to celebrate! I have had so much more fun these last few months, and have felt so much better physically and emotionally than I did last year, that I know I'm headed in the right direction. Baby steps, it just takes baby steps, and celebrate the accomplishments you make with each step.
I am starting to feel better, I'm starting to get some of my confidence and self esteem back and I know its because I have the best family anyone could ask for holding me up, making sure I don't fall, and loving me unconditionally. Without these people, I would not have made it this far. Here's to hoping next year is even better than this one!!!!
Cheers!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
What if?
This morning on my way to work I started thinking, what if things had turned out differently? What if I had the courage to stand up for myself earlier on when things started to go down hill in my marriage? Would I be happy? Would I still end up alone?
These are the things that occupy my brain when I have time to think without distractions. The "what ifs" can consume me at times, and its hard to stop the thoughts from flooding my brain. I know that I am on my way to being a better person, a happier person, but there will always be the what ifs. Its hard to dismiss them. I know that things happen for a reason, and I am finally starting to realize that I am much better off by myself. I know this is true, but its hard to remember some days.
I still struggle with feeling lonely and having someone to chat with about all the little things. This may get easier too? I can only hope.
What if this was all meant to happen, to get to a better place? I know I deserve more than how I've been treated for the past 2 years, and I look forward to living it all out one day at a time =)
These are the things that occupy my brain when I have time to think without distractions. The "what ifs" can consume me at times, and its hard to stop the thoughts from flooding my brain. I know that I am on my way to being a better person, a happier person, but there will always be the what ifs. Its hard to dismiss them. I know that things happen for a reason, and I am finally starting to realize that I am much better off by myself. I know this is true, but its hard to remember some days.
I still struggle with feeling lonely and having someone to chat with about all the little things. This may get easier too? I can only hope.
What if this was all meant to happen, to get to a better place? I know I deserve more than how I've been treated for the past 2 years, and I look forward to living it all out one day at a time =)
Monday, July 18, 2011
Tossing the Dress
So, yesterday I cleaned out what was left from the pre-move garage sale, including my wedding dress. A few months ago, when I was still feeling raw from the separation, I would look at it and cry. I would be engulfed in the emotions of that day, and the way the dress made me feel. I felt beautiful, happy, and completely and totally in love, and hopeful for what the future would bring us. Now, not so much. I have come a long way in the past few months, and the emotions that were tied to the dress are not so strong. I'm dealing with the loss of everything that I wished for on that day. When I carried the dress up from the basement yesterday to bring to the donation center, I didn't cry, I didn't even feel sad. Honestly I was surprised at the progress I have made. It's a small step, to not completely break down when you see or think about things that once help so much meaning to you. It just proves that I am "getting through" and moving on to bigger better things in my life. And. hopefully better company.
The house goes on the market any day, so I guess its on to the next big challenge!
I am woman, and I am strong!
haha, I guess that's my motto today...peace.
The house goes on the market any day, so I guess its on to the next big challenge!
I am woman, and I am strong!
haha, I guess that's my motto today...peace.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Disappointment
Ugh...how do you deal with constant disappointment? I don't know the answer to this but could sure use one? Lately I am constantly disappointed in people and their lack of respect for other people's feelings or their responsibilities. I have also been dealing with the anger and frustration of realizing that some people just aren't cutting it. May be my standards are too high? You'd think that after knowling some one for more than 10 years, you'd have an idea of who they are or what they are capable of, but that just isn't reality. In reality, some people are weak, they are easily influenced by others and in return make bad choices. I hate that.
I do not know everything or think that I am perfect, but I do have a backbone, and can honestly say that I know what my priorities are! I wish I could say that about others. Sorry for the rant, I've just had enough this week and could really use a break from life.
In other news, the kids leave for a week long vacation with their Dad today, and I'm having a hard time. I've never been away from them for more than a few days. This is going to suck, like totally suck! My plan is to stay busy doing things and hanging out with friends as much as possible until they get home. I've learned in the past year that staying busy and keeping myself distracted with activities helps me cope with difficult situations, so that is what I plan to do! God, I hope it works!
I do not know everything or think that I am perfect, but I do have a backbone, and can honestly say that I know what my priorities are! I wish I could say that about others. Sorry for the rant, I've just had enough this week and could really use a break from life.
In other news, the kids leave for a week long vacation with their Dad today, and I'm having a hard time. I've never been away from them for more than a few days. This is going to suck, like totally suck! My plan is to stay busy doing things and hanging out with friends as much as possible until they get home. I've learned in the past year that staying busy and keeping myself distracted with activities helps me cope with difficult situations, so that is what I plan to do! God, I hope it works!
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Lemon Shrimp and Pasta
I whipped up something the other night and fell in love with the results! Its sooo good and EASY that I just had to share!
If you love lemon and spicy, then you will love this! I really didn't measure anything, so I will do my best to give estimates!
Lemon Shrimp and Pasta
1/2 pound of shrimp
1/2 pound of pasta (I like spaghetti, or linguine, but really anything will work!)
1 lemon (zest it until you have about 1 tsp)
1 cup of chicken stock or broth(whatever you have)
1/2 cup of white wine (although I always add more =)
2 tsp of minced garlic
Dried Basil
Dried Parsley
Crushed red pepper
1tbsp of olive oil
1/4 cup butter (less if you care so much)
Boil the pasta. Add the olive oil to a saute pan, and heat on medium.
Add the garlic and cook for about 1 min. then add the broth, wine, lemon zest, juice from the lemon.
The add a couple dashes of the parsley and basil, and as much red pepper as you want (the more you add the spicier it is!). Add salt and pepper to taste and bring it to a boil, then turn down to simmer while the pasta cooks.
When there is about a minute left for the pasta, add your shrimp and butter to the sauce and cook for 2-3 minutes, until the shrimp is done.
Drain the pasta and toss with the shrimp sauce and enjoy!
A couple of things to note about this recipe, is that you could swap the shrimp for chicken, you will just need to add the chicken way before to allow it to cook the whole way. You could also add some broccoli or asparagus! I love this sauce, and could probably put it on anything!
If you love lemon and spicy, then you will love this! I really didn't measure anything, so I will do my best to give estimates!
Lemon Shrimp and Pasta
1/2 pound of shrimp
1/2 pound of pasta (I like spaghetti, or linguine, but really anything will work!)
1 lemon (zest it until you have about 1 tsp)
1 cup of chicken stock or broth(whatever you have)
1/2 cup of white wine (although I always add more =)
2 tsp of minced garlic
Dried Basil
Dried Parsley
Crushed red pepper
1tbsp of olive oil
1/4 cup butter (less if you care so much)
Boil the pasta. Add the olive oil to a saute pan, and heat on medium.
Add the garlic and cook for about 1 min. then add the broth, wine, lemon zest, juice from the lemon.
The add a couple dashes of the parsley and basil, and as much red pepper as you want (the more you add the spicier it is!). Add salt and pepper to taste and bring it to a boil, then turn down to simmer while the pasta cooks.
When there is about a minute left for the pasta, add your shrimp and butter to the sauce and cook for 2-3 minutes, until the shrimp is done.
Drain the pasta and toss with the shrimp sauce and enjoy!
A couple of things to note about this recipe, is that you could swap the shrimp for chicken, you will just need to add the chicken way before to allow it to cook the whole way. You could also add some broccoli or asparagus! I love this sauce, and could probably put it on anything!
All Before 7am...
This morning sucked the big one! It was like the universe was telling me to stay in bed and sleep. I wish. Instead, I overslept.
It all started with not finding anything to wear, then getting the kids up and having to deal with snotty tired attitudes. As we got in the car, Alex has a freakout because he can't get his seat buckled, and continues to cry and grunt as we drive down the road. Then I spill coffee down the front of my shirt...stellar.
Finally I get to my Dad's drop off the kids, and drive to work in a daze. As I arrive at the office, I notice I have 2 small holes in the side of my shirt, and that I forgot my cellphone....ugh. Too bad dressing like a hobo is not in style, otherwise I'd be all set in my coffee stained and holy shirt.
UGH....is 9:30 am too early for a margarita????
It all started with not finding anything to wear, then getting the kids up and having to deal with snotty tired attitudes. As we got in the car, Alex has a freakout because he can't get his seat buckled, and continues to cry and grunt as we drive down the road. Then I spill coffee down the front of my shirt...stellar.
Finally I get to my Dad's drop off the kids, and drive to work in a daze. As I arrive at the office, I notice I have 2 small holes in the side of my shirt, and that I forgot my cellphone....ugh. Too bad dressing like a hobo is not in style, otherwise I'd be all set in my coffee stained and holy shirt.
UGH....is 9:30 am too early for a margarita????
Monday, June 27, 2011
Sometimes all you need is a song...
There are days when I hear a song and it just wraps up everything I'm feeling that day. This morning I heard this song and it just fit!
A side note - I LOVE Ingrid Michaelson! She is great, and this one is hers:
So Long
You've made me into someone
Who should not hold a loaded gun
And now you sit upon my chest
Knock out my wind, knock out my best
And So Long to no disasters and mornings too
And so long to ever afters, so long to you
I am soft for only you
Impale me with your tongue, it's true
And slices of me piled sky high
The same old me to the naked eye
But I can't find myself tonight
And so long to no disasters and mornings too
And so long to ever afters, so long to you
-kpop
A side note - I LOVE Ingrid Michaelson! She is great, and this one is hers:
So Long
You've made me into someone
Who should not hold a loaded gun
And now you sit upon my chest
Knock out my wind, knock out my best
And So Long to no disasters and mornings too
And so long to ever afters, so long to you
I am soft for only you
Impale me with your tongue, it's true
And slices of me piled sky high
The same old me to the naked eye
But I can't find myself tonight
And so long to no disasters and mornings too
And so long to ever afters, so long to you
-kpop
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
My Doodle Bug & Bubba Bear
My baby graduated from Kindergarten yesterday, and today is her last day at school. I can hardly believe it! It seems like just yesterday I was carrying her around on my hip, and watching her toddle around as she learned to walk. The funny thing about her is that she has always wanted to be held and carried, even now as a 5 year old. She never goes too far and always comes back for that affection. I hope as she turns six this August, that she never stops this. She is such an amazing little girl, and the things she has been through in the past year have not rocked her, or changed her from being the loveable, kind, affectionate, caring little girl that she is.
I hope she will always stay strong through life's challenges and embraces change even when it is not desirable.
A recent qoute from the doodle bug "Mom, I am not an ordinary girl, I can figure things out, and I like to go places" My response is, no way are you ordinary! You are extraordinary!
Love her to pieces.
Bubba bear is finishing up second grade today, and that fact alone will make me start crying. Third grade for him next year - Yikes! Seriously, where did the time go? He is my quiet one. I have noticed a change in him this year, he is starting to mature. He does not need me as much, he is very independent and can do most things for himself now. He lives to be with his friends and for playing outside.
I went in to have lunch with him recently in school and he literally ignored me the whole time and was goofing with his friends. AT first this made me sad and a little mad because he insisted that I come sit with him at lunch. Afterwards, I started thinking, that its ok that he ignored me, because he knew I was there. When he thinks back to his days in grade school, he will rememeber that his Mom made the time to come have lunch with him. I guess in the end that is all that matters. I am going to have to get used to this, because this is only the beginning!
They both make me want to be a better Mom everyday, and I will do my best to do just that.
"Home is where your kids are" -Kpop
I hope she will always stay strong through life's challenges and embraces change even when it is not desirable.
A recent qoute from the doodle bug "Mom, I am not an ordinary girl, I can figure things out, and I like to go places" My response is, no way are you ordinary! You are extraordinary!
Love her to pieces.
Bubba bear is finishing up second grade today, and that fact alone will make me start crying. Third grade for him next year - Yikes! Seriously, where did the time go? He is my quiet one. I have noticed a change in him this year, he is starting to mature. He does not need me as much, he is very independent and can do most things for himself now. He lives to be with his friends and for playing outside.
I went in to have lunch with him recently in school and he literally ignored me the whole time and was goofing with his friends. AT first this made me sad and a little mad because he insisted that I come sit with him at lunch. Afterwards, I started thinking, that its ok that he ignored me, because he knew I was there. When he thinks back to his days in grade school, he will rememeber that his Mom made the time to come have lunch with him. I guess in the end that is all that matters. I am going to have to get used to this, because this is only the beginning!
They both make me want to be a better Mom everyday, and I will do my best to do just that.
"Home is where your kids are" -Kpop
Friday, June 17, 2011
Fighting it today...
You know the urge to crawl into a deep dark hole and never come out. Today is one of those days when I feel my self slipping into that deep dark place, where anger and sadness takeover. It's hard to keep myself from giving in to it. The pain can be too much and it just seems easier to stop fighting it. In the past year, I've discovered strength I didn't even know I had. The strength to get out of bed every day and get through the daily routine. There is one reason for this, and its my kids. If it weren't for them, I think I would not have made it. But then there are these days that creep up and hit you like a ton of bricks, and it feel its impossible to free myself from it. I use the term fight, because that is exactly what it feels like, except I don't get to actually punch anyone, although that would be cool...just kidding.
I have been thinking a lot about "home" lately and what that means to me. As I prepare to put the house up for sale its been hard to think that we will be leaving this home. But, I have come realize that instead of the phrase, "home is where the heart is" I'm sating that "home is where my kids are" and as long as I am with them, it doesn't matter where we are. They are my life, and the only thing that gets me through the day, especially on a day like this one.
I have been thinking a lot about "home" lately and what that means to me. As I prepare to put the house up for sale its been hard to think that we will be leaving this home. But, I have come realize that instead of the phrase, "home is where the heart is" I'm sating that "home is where my kids are" and as long as I am with them, it doesn't matter where we are. They are my life, and the only thing that gets me through the day, especially on a day like this one.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
A Day in the Life of a Single Parent
Seriously, I never knew it would be this hard! I was thinking of everythign I had to get done yesterday and where the kids needed to be and what they needed for school the next day, and what to pack for lunches, and OMG what to feed them for dinner before baseball, and it got me thinking...
Wow, there is so much to do all the time, and it never stops. I have been a single parent for 6 months now and the daily routine is just about killing me. It's hard, and never gets easier. I remember when I started out this new life, thinking to myself, "oh it will get easier with time" but this is just not true. It has remained hard and tiring. I have learned to be more efficient with my time, to let some things go, because seriously, there is just no time!
I thought it may be interesting to see what my typical day looks like. This was yesterday:
5:15 - wake up, shower, make myself presentable.
6:00 - Open the kids doors and windows, my first attempt to wake them up!
6:15 - Start coffee, take Rufus out, then feed him and Phoebe the cat.
6:25 - Go get both kids up for good, get Aubree dressed, and do her hair. Thank goodness Alex can get himself dressed and can "kind of" fix his hair.
6:30 - pack lunches, pack bags, check school calendars for any extra things we may need to remember, get coats/shoes on, and most importantlt remember my coffee!
6:40 - Put Rufus in the kennel, and get all the bags, and get in the car.
6:50 - Drop kids off at Dads, then drive to work.
7:15 - Arrive at work, ahhhh now I can breathe, drink my coffee, and start work!
3:00 - leave work
3:25 - Speed shop at Tops to get milk, bread, creamer, and necessities that we are out of.
3:50 - Get home, unload groceries, take Rufus out.
4:00 - Kids get off the bus, and now homework time.
4:15 - unpack school bags, go through paperwork, do homework, re-pack bags for the next day, and include a snack for each kid.
4:30 - Feed both kids, because its baseball night.
5:00 - Change for baseball, pack activities for Aubree do do while at baseball.
5:15 - Feed Rufus and Phoebe and take him out
5:30 - leave for baseball
8:00 - Get home, and rush rush to get both kids bathed (only if really dirty =) PJ's on, teeth brushed, and to bed ASAP!
8:15 - Pack my lunch for the next day, get the coffee ready for the am, and give Rufus his treat for the day!
8:30 - Finally, sit down, watch some TV, fold a load of laundry.
9:30 - Take Rufus out, go up to bed, and read some more.
10:00 - Pass out from exhaustion =)
Then it all starts over again at 5:15 the next morning!
I have to admit I am looking forward to summer, and I'm hoping that we will get some more down time in our daily schedule, but we shall see!
Wow, there is so much to do all the time, and it never stops. I have been a single parent for 6 months now and the daily routine is just about killing me. It's hard, and never gets easier. I remember when I started out this new life, thinking to myself, "oh it will get easier with time" but this is just not true. It has remained hard and tiring. I have learned to be more efficient with my time, to let some things go, because seriously, there is just no time!
I thought it may be interesting to see what my typical day looks like. This was yesterday:
5:15 - wake up, shower, make myself presentable.
6:00 - Open the kids doors and windows, my first attempt to wake them up!
6:15 - Start coffee, take Rufus out, then feed him and Phoebe the cat.
6:25 - Go get both kids up for good, get Aubree dressed, and do her hair. Thank goodness Alex can get himself dressed and can "kind of" fix his hair.
6:30 - pack lunches, pack bags, check school calendars for any extra things we may need to remember, get coats/shoes on, and most importantlt remember my coffee!
6:40 - Put Rufus in the kennel, and get all the bags, and get in the car.
6:50 - Drop kids off at Dads, then drive to work.
7:15 - Arrive at work, ahhhh now I can breathe, drink my coffee, and start work!
3:00 - leave work
3:25 - Speed shop at Tops to get milk, bread, creamer, and necessities that we are out of.
3:50 - Get home, unload groceries, take Rufus out.
4:00 - Kids get off the bus, and now homework time.
4:15 - unpack school bags, go through paperwork, do homework, re-pack bags for the next day, and include a snack for each kid.
4:30 - Feed both kids, because its baseball night.
5:00 - Change for baseball, pack activities for Aubree do do while at baseball.
5:15 - Feed Rufus and Phoebe and take him out
5:30 - leave for baseball
8:00 - Get home, and rush rush to get both kids bathed (only if really dirty =) PJ's on, teeth brushed, and to bed ASAP!
8:15 - Pack my lunch for the next day, get the coffee ready for the am, and give Rufus his treat for the day!
8:30 - Finally, sit down, watch some TV, fold a load of laundry.
9:30 - Take Rufus out, go up to bed, and read some more.
10:00 - Pass out from exhaustion =)
Then it all starts over again at 5:15 the next morning!
I have to admit I am looking forward to summer, and I'm hoping that we will get some more down time in our daily schedule, but we shall see!
Friday, June 3, 2011
The Single Life
I've never heard anyone talk about the benefits of being single. We usually hear how badly we want to be in a relationship, and how we envy everyone else....well let me tell ya, there are many benefits to living the single life, and here are my top 5:
1. Clean bathroom always, no hair, no toothpaste stuck to the sink, and the best part is there is not pee splashed all over the toilet!!
2. You get the bed all to yourself!
3. Once the kids are in bed, the TV is all yours.
4. If you want to eat ice cream and sit in your underwear, there is no judgement.
5. You can do anything you want whenever you want, and your schedule is your only concern.
I could go on and on, but I won't. I have made many discoveries living this life I am now, and they are not all bad! I think a lot of times women don;t realize how strong they are until the are emotionally separated from a man. You get so used to relying on this other person, that you think you cannot live without them. I thought this at one time, and remember telling people, I could never make it as a single parent. Well, obviously that is not the truth, not even close! I have found strength I didn't even know I possessed. I think this is probably the case for most single Mom's. I'm not saying that it is easy, its definitely NOT easy, but it can be done, and that is what's important!
I don't know what my future holds, but whatever it is I know that I will be happy, because I won;t settle for anything less ever again.
1. Clean bathroom always, no hair, no toothpaste stuck to the sink, and the best part is there is not pee splashed all over the toilet!!
2. You get the bed all to yourself!
3. Once the kids are in bed, the TV is all yours.
4. If you want to eat ice cream and sit in your underwear, there is no judgement.
5. You can do anything you want whenever you want, and your schedule is your only concern.
I could go on and on, but I won't. I have made many discoveries living this life I am now, and they are not all bad! I think a lot of times women don;t realize how strong they are until the are emotionally separated from a man. You get so used to relying on this other person, that you think you cannot live without them. I thought this at one time, and remember telling people, I could never make it as a single parent. Well, obviously that is not the truth, not even close! I have found strength I didn't even know I possessed. I think this is probably the case for most single Mom's. I'm not saying that it is easy, its definitely NOT easy, but it can be done, and that is what's important!
I don't know what my future holds, but whatever it is I know that I will be happy, because I won;t settle for anything less ever again.
Monday, May 23, 2011
My One True Love....
If you know me then you know my favorite thing to eat in the world and my one true love is Pizza! I literally could eat it every day, no joke. I am also a creature of habit and when it comes to the pizza I like, it's usually red sauce, cheese, and may be some peppers and mushrooms, but nothing too fancy. Well with the whole healthier eating kick, I have been thinking of ways to lighten it up a bit and I tried a new recipe last weekend and it was super delish, especially with a nice cold Blue Moon on the side.
Here's the recipe, you must give this a go!
Whole Wheat Asparagus and Goat Cheese Pizza
1 Whole Wheat Boboli (because I was lazy and didn't want to make my own)
2 tbsp of Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Part Skim Shredded Mozzarella
4 oz Herbed Goat Cheese
1 Bunch of aparagus washed, snapped, and cut into 1 inch chuncks
Crished Red Pepper (oh yeah, soooo good a spicy)
Basil
Kosher Salt
Steam the asparagus (I put mine in the microwave for about 1.30 with a little water) then set aside.
Spread oil over the crust, then sprinkle with a little salt and basil. Next add a thin layer of mozzarella, then add the aspargus. Sprinkle with crushed red pepper, then break the goat cheese up and sprinkle it all over. Finally top with more mozzarella and bake it at 450 for about 8-10 minutes. I bake it right on the oven rack so it gets crispy!
Enjoy!
Here's the recipe, you must give this a go!
Whole Wheat Asparagus and Goat Cheese Pizza
1 Whole Wheat Boboli (because I was lazy and didn't want to make my own)
2 tbsp of Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Part Skim Shredded Mozzarella
4 oz Herbed Goat Cheese
1 Bunch of aparagus washed, snapped, and cut into 1 inch chuncks
Crished Red Pepper (oh yeah, soooo good a spicy)
Basil
Kosher Salt
Steam the asparagus (I put mine in the microwave for about 1.30 with a little water) then set aside.
Spread oil over the crust, then sprinkle with a little salt and basil. Next add a thin layer of mozzarella, then add the aspargus. Sprinkle with crushed red pepper, then break the goat cheese up and sprinkle it all over. Finally top with more mozzarella and bake it at 450 for about 8-10 minutes. I bake it right on the oven rack so it gets crispy!
Enjoy!
Thursday, May 12, 2011
My Go To Summer Pasta Salad Recipe
I have been making this pasta salad recipe for years and everyone loves it, even Alex, so that is saying somehting!
I try and keep it light and fresh as well as yummy!
Kelly's Pasta Salad
1 pound tri-color rotini
1 roasted red pepper, or fresh chopped - whatever you like
1 head fresh broccoli chopped
1 can black olives drained
1 jar green olives drained
1 bottle light ceaser dressing
1 small package part skim mozzarella cubed
Boil the pasta, in the last minute of cooking throw the broccoli in and let it get a little soft. The drain both and run cold water over it to cool and stop the cooking process. Set aside.
In a large bowl, add the peppers, cheese, black and green olives, the finally throw in the pasta and broccoli.
Pour in a bit of the dressing and toss, add more dressing to your taste. Once its all combined refrigerate for at least an hour before serving, and enjoy!
A couple of notes:
This recipe is so versatile! In the past I have thrown in pepperoni, cheddar, or jack cheese. I've also made this with a homeade dressing of balsamic, olive oil, salt, and pepper!
I will usually whip a batch of this on Sunday, when I know its going to be a crazy week and we will be scrambling for dinner in between school and activities. I also pack it for lunch! It's great, go make it!
I try and keep it light and fresh as well as yummy!
Kelly's Pasta Salad
1 pound tri-color rotini
1 roasted red pepper, or fresh chopped - whatever you like
1 head fresh broccoli chopped
1 can black olives drained
1 jar green olives drained
1 bottle light ceaser dressing
1 small package part skim mozzarella cubed
Boil the pasta, in the last minute of cooking throw the broccoli in and let it get a little soft. The drain both and run cold water over it to cool and stop the cooking process. Set aside.
In a large bowl, add the peppers, cheese, black and green olives, the finally throw in the pasta and broccoli.
Pour in a bit of the dressing and toss, add more dressing to your taste. Once its all combined refrigerate for at least an hour before serving, and enjoy!
A couple of notes:
This recipe is so versatile! In the past I have thrown in pepperoni, cheddar, or jack cheese. I've also made this with a homeade dressing of balsamic, olive oil, salt, and pepper!
I will usually whip a batch of this on Sunday, when I know its going to be a crazy week and we will be scrambling for dinner in between school and activities. I also pack it for lunch! It's great, go make it!
The Trees Can STOP!
Yes the trees can stop pollunating now! UGH! My allergies are so bad right now. My head feel like its ready to explode! Literally!
This last fall I finally went to the allergist. After suffering for years from random allergies, I needed to know what specifically was setting me off. After the skin tests, it was confirmed that I had many allergies. Pretty much EVERYTHING outside! Trees and grasses are the worst, but hayfever is right there too. I am also allergic to cats, some molds, and a pretty severe dust mite allergy.
The best part of knowing what sets me off into an allergic frenzy, is that now I can take the necessary precautions to avoid those things as much as possible. This can be hard, especially in the early spring and fall, when the trees and grasses are at their peak. It makes me sad that I have to keep the windows closed now, and run the AC earlier in the seaason. This is a huge help as the air gets filtered within the hosue and you can keep the pollens out!
The other big one is the dust mites, which are the worst in bedrooms. I went out and got the expensive covers for the mattress and pillows. I also have to wash all my bedding once a week in Hot water. This kills everything! Since doing this I have not had to use my inhaler at all - yey!
This is something that I have learned to live with. I take zyrtec every day all year round, and use a nasal spray once a day. The cool thing is that I have not had to use my inhaler since I've made these changes, so that's awesome. Allergies can be extemely annoying, but I am trying to live with them. The trees are so bad right now that I am taking zyrtec along with 3 advil, just to get through the day, so please trees, stop it already =)
-peace
This last fall I finally went to the allergist. After suffering for years from random allergies, I needed to know what specifically was setting me off. After the skin tests, it was confirmed that I had many allergies. Pretty much EVERYTHING outside! Trees and grasses are the worst, but hayfever is right there too. I am also allergic to cats, some molds, and a pretty severe dust mite allergy.
The best part of knowing what sets me off into an allergic frenzy, is that now I can take the necessary precautions to avoid those things as much as possible. This can be hard, especially in the early spring and fall, when the trees and grasses are at their peak. It makes me sad that I have to keep the windows closed now, and run the AC earlier in the seaason. This is a huge help as the air gets filtered within the hosue and you can keep the pollens out!
The other big one is the dust mites, which are the worst in bedrooms. I went out and got the expensive covers for the mattress and pillows. I also have to wash all my bedding once a week in Hot water. This kills everything! Since doing this I have not had to use my inhaler at all - yey!
This is something that I have learned to live with. I take zyrtec every day all year round, and use a nasal spray once a day. The cool thing is that I have not had to use my inhaler since I've made these changes, so that's awesome. Allergies can be extemely annoying, but I am trying to live with them. The trees are so bad right now that I am taking zyrtec along with 3 advil, just to get through the day, so please trees, stop it already =)
-peace
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Cleaning Through Memories
So...the tough process has officially started. We are trying to get the house ready to put on the market. I didn't think it would be this hard. The lasy week or so, I have been slowly going through all the bins in the basement, and sorting into piles. One Trash, one for me, and one for him, and it sucks. It's amazing to me how intertwined my life had become with another person. I guess that is what happens when you meet someone at such a young age and start building a life together.
It's been an emotional roller coaster. There are momentos I have come across that remind me of when I was kid, and they make me feel good, but most make me feel bad. I had to go through the "wedding" bins, and toss out all the thoughful cards we recieved, responses, and planning materials. I remember when I packed them away 8 years ago, I felt so good and hopeful for the future, and thought that some day when we were old, it might be fun to look back at this stuff and enjoy the memories together. This makes me sad. I feel like I never really got the chance I should have to make things right, to make things work, and I hate that.
I feel as if I'm officially throwing my old life into the garbage...and it hurts. My only hope is that by going through this horrible process, I can only be stronger when its over. I fear that I will never be able to let go and move on, I also fear that I will no be able to do this again, ever. May be with time the pain will subside and I will forget? May be its like child birth, as time passes, you forget the pain and want to do it again to get the big prize?
I don't know....I just know that right now I feel frustrated, angry, and sad.
-peace
It's been an emotional roller coaster. There are momentos I have come across that remind me of when I was kid, and they make me feel good, but most make me feel bad. I had to go through the "wedding" bins, and toss out all the thoughful cards we recieved, responses, and planning materials. I remember when I packed them away 8 years ago, I felt so good and hopeful for the future, and thought that some day when we were old, it might be fun to look back at this stuff and enjoy the memories together. This makes me sad. I feel like I never really got the chance I should have to make things right, to make things work, and I hate that.
I feel as if I'm officially throwing my old life into the garbage...and it hurts. My only hope is that by going through this horrible process, I can only be stronger when its over. I fear that I will never be able to let go and move on, I also fear that I will no be able to do this again, ever. May be with time the pain will subside and I will forget? May be its like child birth, as time passes, you forget the pain and want to do it again to get the big prize?
I don't know....I just know that right now I feel frustrated, angry, and sad.
-peace
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
How to Lighten Up Traditional Tacos
One of the kids all time favorite meals is traditional tacos that you make using a taco kit and ground beef. I have to admit that I also love this meal, the cheese and sour cream = YUMMM. So I've tried to stay away from this because its really not that healthy, but with all the quickie dinners we need these days, it is really a good option. So the challenge is how to make them a bit healthier?
First, while at Wegmans, I found a taco kit that comes with whole grain taco shells. Next, instead of getting ground beef, I opted for ground turkey. The last thing I did was add some cleaned and rinsed black beans to the meat and sauce, and let me say, it was soo good! I did not miss the beef at all! Aubree loved the beans, but Alex did not, big surprise there. He actually opened up the taco and picked all the beans out...ugh! I tried =)
I find that its still a challenge every day to get that kid to eat better. I even gave him a little spiel about how beans are packed with protein and that if he eats then they will make him stronger, but no good it did. Oh well I will never stop trying!
A quick note about the sides for tacos, try light sour cream, and salsa to lighten up more. The other cool thing is that traditional taco sauce does not have chunks in it like salsa does, so picky kids even like it!
First, while at Wegmans, I found a taco kit that comes with whole grain taco shells. Next, instead of getting ground beef, I opted for ground turkey. The last thing I did was add some cleaned and rinsed black beans to the meat and sauce, and let me say, it was soo good! I did not miss the beef at all! Aubree loved the beans, but Alex did not, big surprise there. He actually opened up the taco and picked all the beans out...ugh! I tried =)
I find that its still a challenge every day to get that kid to eat better. I even gave him a little spiel about how beans are packed with protein and that if he eats then they will make him stronger, but no good it did. Oh well I will never stop trying!
A quick note about the sides for tacos, try light sour cream, and salsa to lighten up more. The other cool thing is that traditional taco sauce does not have chunks in it like salsa does, so picky kids even like it!
Monday, April 25, 2011
Too Hot?
Here is a little coversation between Aubree and me last night as she was showing ne her new Barbie she got from from the Easter bunny:
Aubree: Do you think she is too hot?
Me: Umm...what does that mean?
Aubree: You know too fancy and stuff
Me: I guess she is a little too fancy
Aubree: yeah I think she is too
She amazes me with the stuff she comes out with? It made me little nervous that she knew how to use the word hot in that context and got me thinking about where she may have heard it. As I thought about it, I realized that its used EVERYWHERE nowadays, I'm sure its even used in some of the Disney shows she watches. There is really not much I can do about it, but let her think that it means being too fancy.
Kids today are so much more exposed to things at an earlier age, and once they start riding a bus and going to school, you really lose control over who they talk to and what they are doing 24/7. It's scary. I've always said that I would be completely honest with my kids about everything, regardless of how awkward it may be. I like to think that by giving them knowledge and the truth, that it will prevent them being too curious and getting the wrong idea from kids at school. I hope I'm right!
Aubree: Do you think she is too hot?
Me: Umm...what does that mean?
Aubree: You know too fancy and stuff
Me: I guess she is a little too fancy
Aubree: yeah I think she is too
She amazes me with the stuff she comes out with? It made me little nervous that she knew how to use the word hot in that context and got me thinking about where she may have heard it. As I thought about it, I realized that its used EVERYWHERE nowadays, I'm sure its even used in some of the Disney shows she watches. There is really not much I can do about it, but let her think that it means being too fancy.
Kids today are so much more exposed to things at an earlier age, and once they start riding a bus and going to school, you really lose control over who they talk to and what they are doing 24/7. It's scary. I've always said that I would be completely honest with my kids about everything, regardless of how awkward it may be. I like to think that by giving them knowledge and the truth, that it will prevent them being too curious and getting the wrong idea from kids at school. I hope I'm right!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Crazy in this House!
Well the title says it all! Life has been so busy mixed in with a little crazy. Every year as Spring approaches, the calendar seems to fill up with family gatherings and activities. During the Winter months the only thing we have to do is karate twice a week. Starting to today, we will now be balancing baseball and karate during the week...yikes! This will be tricky while school is still in session. It's hard enough trying to get homework done and get to karate twice a week, now it will be baseball too. The nice part about all this is that the kids LOVE it! It's why we do it all in the first place right? So they can have fun and try new things. I know the next two months are going to be all kinds of crazy, but as crazy as it is, it will be that much fun too!
We celebrated my Dad's birthday last Friday by having a quiet dinner at home. I made this delicious shrimp and rice dish that will make you melt. I literally day dream about this meal, it is that good. Plus, if you like spicey, then this is for you. I followed dinner up with the Ultimate Chocolate Cake -YUMMMM. I posted that recipe a while back, it so good.
In other news, life has been rolling along. I broke the news to the kids last week that we were going to have to sell our house. I was expecting some sadness, but again they surprised me. They seemed excited to be moving on, into a new place. I tried to explain that it was going to be a slow process, but kids have a hard time with the passing of time, and what a few months really means. I have the most amazing kids. They have always embraced change, and never resisted it, and this is no different. I am so grateful for them, and continue to be amazed by them every day.
Life can be so confusing and at times can just plain suck, but when I look at them I can't help but be thankful for everything I have. They are my reason for living!
Now back to the food! Be warned, this is not a healthy dish! I usually will not add the full amount of Tabasco, because of the kids. The cool thing is that you can just add it to your food once its plated. The other key thing is using fresh lemon juice, since the substitute kinda sucks.
Here is the recipe i used from Giada De Laurentiis:
Nona Luna's Rice
1 stick butter, divided, at room temperature
2 cups parboiled long-grain rice, such as Uncle Ben's
3 1/2 cups chicken stock
2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 clove garlic, minced
2 pounds small shrimp, peeled and deveined
1/2 cup lemon juice (about 2 lemons)
1 tablespoon hot sauce
1 cup whipping cream
Freshly ground black pepper
In a medium nonstick saucepan, heat 1/2 of the butter over medium-low heat. Add the rice and cook, stirring frequently, until golden, about 6 to 7 minutes. Add the chicken stock and salt. Bring the mixture to a boil. Reduce the heat to medium-low and simmer covered for 20 to 25 minutes until the rice is tender and all the liquid is absorbed. Remove the pan from the heat and rest covered for 5 minutes.
In a large skillet, melt the remaining butter over medium heat. Add the garlic and cook, stirring frequently, for 1 to 2 minutes until aromatic. Add the shrimp, lemon juice, and hot sauce. Cook for 2 to 3 minutes until the shrimp is pink and cooked through. Stir in the cream and heat through. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.
Using a fork, fluff the rice and arrange on a platter. Spoon the shrimp cream sauce over the rice and serve.
Make this, you will not be disappointed and its a great dish to serve at a dinner party!
Enjoy!
We celebrated my Dad's birthday last Friday by having a quiet dinner at home. I made this delicious shrimp and rice dish that will make you melt. I literally day dream about this meal, it is that good. Plus, if you like spicey, then this is for you. I followed dinner up with the Ultimate Chocolate Cake -YUMMMM. I posted that recipe a while back, it so good.
In other news, life has been rolling along. I broke the news to the kids last week that we were going to have to sell our house. I was expecting some sadness, but again they surprised me. They seemed excited to be moving on, into a new place. I tried to explain that it was going to be a slow process, but kids have a hard time with the passing of time, and what a few months really means. I have the most amazing kids. They have always embraced change, and never resisted it, and this is no different. I am so grateful for them, and continue to be amazed by them every day.
Life can be so confusing and at times can just plain suck, but when I look at them I can't help but be thankful for everything I have. They are my reason for living!
Now back to the food! Be warned, this is not a healthy dish! I usually will not add the full amount of Tabasco, because of the kids. The cool thing is that you can just add it to your food once its plated. The other key thing is using fresh lemon juice, since the substitute kinda sucks.
Here is the recipe i used from Giada De Laurentiis:
Nona Luna's Rice
1 stick butter, divided, at room temperature
2 cups parboiled long-grain rice, such as Uncle Ben's
3 1/2 cups chicken stock
2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 clove garlic, minced
2 pounds small shrimp, peeled and deveined
1/2 cup lemon juice (about 2 lemons)
1 tablespoon hot sauce
1 cup whipping cream
Freshly ground black pepper
In a medium nonstick saucepan, heat 1/2 of the butter over medium-low heat. Add the rice and cook, stirring frequently, until golden, about 6 to 7 minutes. Add the chicken stock and salt. Bring the mixture to a boil. Reduce the heat to medium-low and simmer covered for 20 to 25 minutes until the rice is tender and all the liquid is absorbed. Remove the pan from the heat and rest covered for 5 minutes.
In a large skillet, melt the remaining butter over medium heat. Add the garlic and cook, stirring frequently, for 1 to 2 minutes until aromatic. Add the shrimp, lemon juice, and hot sauce. Cook for 2 to 3 minutes until the shrimp is pink and cooked through. Stir in the cream and heat through. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.
Using a fork, fluff the rice and arrange on a platter. Spoon the shrimp cream sauce over the rice and serve.
Make this, you will not be disappointed and its a great dish to serve at a dinner party!
Enjoy!
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Old Habits Die Hard...
The old saying "old habits die hard" cannot be more true for me. I catch myself doing things out of habit that no longer make sense. For example, the other day I was cooking dinner and went to set the table and got out 4 forks to put on the table. It took me a minute to realize what I did? It kind of made me sad, because as much as I feel ok with everything and seem to be focusing on the future, I cannot seem to get used to the day to day things that are routine and habit. I also realized the other day that I still use the "we" reference quite often. I'm not sure why? Habit I guess? I hate that I do that, but it must be one of those things that changes with time.
I need to remember that its ok to slip up now and then. Being part of a couple for 12 years and a family of 4 for 5 of those years will do that to you, it becomes second nature. I hope that with time I will get used to saying "I" and getting only 3 forks out of the drawer. Until then I will try not to focus too much on these old habits and try and get used to the new way of life as a family of 3. The best family of 3 I can think of =)
I need to remember that its ok to slip up now and then. Being part of a couple for 12 years and a family of 4 for 5 of those years will do that to you, it becomes second nature. I hope that with time I will get used to saying "I" and getting only 3 forks out of the drawer. Until then I will try not to focus too much on these old habits and try and get used to the new way of life as a family of 3. The best family of 3 I can think of =)
Monday, April 4, 2011
Blondies
Ok this is NOT a healthy recipe what so ever, but it is delicious! I made these for the kids yesterday and they loved them. The best part about this recipe though is that you can mix it all up in one bowl with one spoon! Yey for an easy clean up.
I just realized that I posted 2 desert recipes in a row...yikes! I will try and post a more healthy meal soon =)
Blondies
1 cup flour (I used all natural unbleached)
1 tsp sea salt
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1 stick butter
1 egg
1 2/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
Melt butter, and then add it to the brown sugar and mix until smooth. Next, add in the egg, salt, and vanilla and mix until smooth. Then, add in the flour and mix gently (do not over mix). Last add in the chocolate chips.
Grease a small 8x8 or 9x9 pan, and pour the batter in and smooth out evenly. Bake at 350 for about 25 minutes. Let them cool a bit before cutting in, because they need time to set and get nice and gooey!
Enjoy!
I just realized that I posted 2 desert recipes in a row...yikes! I will try and post a more healthy meal soon =)
Blondies
1 cup flour (I used all natural unbleached)
1 tsp sea salt
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1 stick butter
1 egg
1 2/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
Melt butter, and then add it to the brown sugar and mix until smooth. Next, add in the egg, salt, and vanilla and mix until smooth. Then, add in the flour and mix gently (do not over mix). Last add in the chocolate chips.
Grease a small 8x8 or 9x9 pan, and pour the batter in and smooth out evenly. Bake at 350 for about 25 minutes. Let them cool a bit before cutting in, because they need time to set and get nice and gooey!
Enjoy!
Friday, April 1, 2011
The BEST Chocolate cake ever!
I can't believe I am going to share my most coveted recipe to date. The Too Much Chocolate cake! I actually dream about this cake its that good. The best part is that it has to be the easiest desert I've ever made. The only investment I made was the 12 cup Bundt pan, which was around 10 bucks! The thing is, its not low fat by any means, but when you choose to indulge, who cares right?
Chocolate Cake
1 box of Devils Food cake mix
1 box of instant chocolate pudding mix
1 cup of sour cream
1 cup vegetable oil
4 eggs
1/2 cup warm water
2 cups chocolate chips (I like to get the Ghirardelli and i usually add more than 2 cups =)
Add all ingredients to a mixing bowl and mix (yes its that easy!)
Pour mix into a well greased bundt pan and bake at 350 for about 55 minutes or until it stops giggling in the pan.
Once you take it out of the oven let it rest in the pan for about an hour, then gently flip out onto a serving patter, and voila!
Some notes - I usually sprinkle some powdered sugar on top to make it look nice, but you could also add some melted chocolate, or a ganache to the top-YUMMMM!
You can thank me later!
Chocolate Cake
1 box of Devils Food cake mix
1 box of instant chocolate pudding mix
1 cup of sour cream
1 cup vegetable oil
4 eggs
1/2 cup warm water
2 cups chocolate chips (I like to get the Ghirardelli and i usually add more than 2 cups =)
Add all ingredients to a mixing bowl and mix (yes its that easy!)
Pour mix into a well greased bundt pan and bake at 350 for about 55 minutes or until it stops giggling in the pan.
Once you take it out of the oven let it rest in the pan for about an hour, then gently flip out onto a serving patter, and voila!
Some notes - I usually sprinkle some powdered sugar on top to make it look nice, but you could also add some melted chocolate, or a ganache to the top-YUMMMM!
You can thank me later!
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Buddies
Yesterday the kids both had dentist appointments, so I needed to pick them up from school early. While Aubree and I were waiting for Alex to come down to the lobby, his best bud at school comes walking out of the nurses office with his Mom. We said hello and then his Mom says "I had to come pick him up because he hit his head hard while playing outside at recess" I was a bit concerned, but he seemed fine. The first thing his little friend says to me is "where's Alex?" I told him we were waiting for him to come down.
Just then, Alex cam around the corner, and when the two boys saw each other, they started running and hugged. The first thing Alex says is "Oh, are you alright? What happened?" I thought this was one of the cutest things I have ever seen. At seven years old they still hug each other and are genuinley worried about their friends. I love this, and I hope Alex will always be so kind and thoughful to others.
My heart is warmed by my amazing children again =)
Just then, Alex cam around the corner, and when the two boys saw each other, they started running and hugged. The first thing Alex says is "Oh, are you alright? What happened?" I thought this was one of the cutest things I have ever seen. At seven years old they still hug each other and are genuinley worried about their friends. I love this, and I hope Alex will always be so kind and thoughful to others.
My heart is warmed by my amazing children again =)
Monday, March 28, 2011
My Morning Smoothie
Hiya and happy Monday...ugh I hate that expression! How about, Happy let's not get out of bed day!
Any way, I've been wanting to post my tried and true green smoothie recipe that I've been making for about a year now. It may sound gross, but trust me, its not. It is FABULOUS! The kids like to call it the incredible hulk because well, its green and I tell them that it will make them strong just like the hulk. Of course Alex won't try it, but Aubree LOVES it! I just bought some flax seed that I need to grind up, so I can add it too.
Here it is:
The Incredible Hulk
1 banana (I keep some unpeeled and frozen, but fresh works too)
1 cup of frozen tropical fruit (I like Dole mango, pineapple, strawberry, peaches mix)
1/2 cup water
1/2 cup Stoneyfield plain fat free yogurt
1/2 cup Stoneyfield vanilla fat free yogurt
2 hand fulls of organic fresh baby spinach
1 squirt of honey (optional, but I like it sweet =)
Add to the blender in this order, banana, water, frozen fruit, spinach, yogurt, honey
Blend till completely smooth (my blender has the frappe setting, so I like to do that at the end so its thick!)
Additional Notes:
When you use a frozen banana, you may need to add more water, but if you use fresh, then you may need less. Also, if you choose to use all plain yogurt then you may need more honey or agave syrup. If you use all vanilla, then you will not need honey at all. You can tailor the smoothie to be as sweet as you like it!
I am going to throw in the ground flax tomorrow =)
Hope you like it!
Any way, I've been wanting to post my tried and true green smoothie recipe that I've been making for about a year now. It may sound gross, but trust me, its not. It is FABULOUS! The kids like to call it the incredible hulk because well, its green and I tell them that it will make them strong just like the hulk. Of course Alex won't try it, but Aubree LOVES it! I just bought some flax seed that I need to grind up, so I can add it too.
Here it is:
The Incredible Hulk
1 banana (I keep some unpeeled and frozen, but fresh works too)
1 cup of frozen tropical fruit (I like Dole mango, pineapple, strawberry, peaches mix)
1/2 cup water
1/2 cup Stoneyfield plain fat free yogurt
1/2 cup Stoneyfield vanilla fat free yogurt
2 hand fulls of organic fresh baby spinach
1 squirt of honey (optional, but I like it sweet =)
Add to the blender in this order, banana, water, frozen fruit, spinach, yogurt, honey
Blend till completely smooth (my blender has the frappe setting, so I like to do that at the end so its thick!)
Additional Notes:
When you use a frozen banana, you may need to add more water, but if you use fresh, then you may need less. Also, if you choose to use all plain yogurt then you may need more honey or agave syrup. If you use all vanilla, then you will not need honey at all. You can tailor the smoothie to be as sweet as you like it!
I am going to throw in the ground flax tomorrow =)
Hope you like it!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
A Mother's Interview
This was interesting and kind if funny!
1. What is something Mom always says to you?
Alex: Clean your room
Aubree: How was your day when i get off the bus
2. What makes mom happy?
Alex: When I clean my room without any problems
Aubree: When I give you hugs
3. What makes mom sad?
Alex: WHen you don't see me and Aubree
Aubree: When you miss your mom and dad
4. How does your mom make you laugh?
Alex: When you dance funny
Aubree: When you tickle me
5. What was your mom like as a child?
Alex: You played soccer
Aubree: silly
6. How old is your mom?
Alex: 35
Aubree: 35?
7. How tall is your mom?
Alex: tall
Aubree: big
8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Alex: Drink her coffee
Aubree: play with me
9. What does your mom do when you are not home?
Alex: Go to work
Aubree: work
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Alex: Great singer
Aubree: singing
11. What is your mom really good at?
Alex: Loving
Aubree: making me laugh
12. What is your mom not very good at?
Alex: Playing my Wii games
Aubree:
13. What does your mom do for a job?
Alex: Go to work?
Aubree:
14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Alex: salad? pasta?
Aubree: Getting wine open
15. What makes you proud of your mom?
Alex: When you hug me
Aubree: cause you read good
16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Alex: Bugs Bunny
Aubree: Dora
17. What do you and your mom do together?
Alex: Go to the store
Aubree: play
18. How are you and your mom the same?
Alex: Both llike to listen to music
Aubree: cause we have the same skin color
19. How are you and your mom different?
Alex: I'm a boy and you are a girl
Aubree: our hair is not the same color
20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Alex: Cause she hugs me a lot
Aubree: cause you give me hugs
21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Alex: to Kohls
Aubree: to a restaurant
22. What do you like most of all about your mom?
Alex: That she let me have a ipod
Aubree: she gives me hugs and kisses
I had no idea I was such a good singer! haha!
1. What is something Mom always says to you?
Alex: Clean your room
Aubree: How was your day when i get off the bus
2. What makes mom happy?
Alex: When I clean my room without any problems
Aubree: When I give you hugs
3. What makes mom sad?
Alex: WHen you don't see me and Aubree
Aubree: When you miss your mom and dad
4. How does your mom make you laugh?
Alex: When you dance funny
Aubree: When you tickle me
5. What was your mom like as a child?
Alex: You played soccer
Aubree: silly
6. How old is your mom?
Alex: 35
Aubree: 35?
7. How tall is your mom?
Alex: tall
Aubree: big
8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Alex: Drink her coffee
Aubree: play with me
9. What does your mom do when you are not home?
Alex: Go to work
Aubree: work
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Alex: Great singer
Aubree: singing
11. What is your mom really good at?
Alex: Loving
Aubree: making me laugh
12. What is your mom not very good at?
Alex: Playing my Wii games
Aubree:
13. What does your mom do for a job?
Alex: Go to work?
Aubree:
14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Alex: salad? pasta?
Aubree: Getting wine open
15. What makes you proud of your mom?
Alex: When you hug me
Aubree: cause you read good
16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Alex: Bugs Bunny
Aubree: Dora
17. What do you and your mom do together?
Alex: Go to the store
Aubree: play
18. How are you and your mom the same?
Alex: Both llike to listen to music
Aubree: cause we have the same skin color
19. How are you and your mom different?
Alex: I'm a boy and you are a girl
Aubree: our hair is not the same color
20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Alex: Cause she hugs me a lot
Aubree: cause you give me hugs
21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Alex: to Kohls
Aubree: to a restaurant
22. What do you like most of all about your mom?
Alex: That she let me have a ipod
Aubree: she gives me hugs and kisses
I had no idea I was such a good singer! haha!
Lemony Yumminess!
Ok... so I actually did some cooking this week! Yey!
Here is an AWESOME recipe that I used from the Pioneer Woman. It is super simple and so good.
Warning: If you do not like lemon then skip it, because its full of fresh lemon and garlic flavor!
Baked Lemon Pasta
1 pound pasta (I used campanelle)
4 tbsp butter
2 tbsp olive oil
2 minced garlic cloves
1 whole lemon, juiced and zested
2 cups sour cream
kosher salt
parmesan cheese
parsley
Here is an AWESOME recipe that I used from the Pioneer Woman. It is super simple and so good.
Warning: If you do not like lemon then skip it, because its full of fresh lemon and garlic flavor!
Baked Lemon Pasta
1 pound pasta (I used campanelle)
4 tbsp butter
2 tbsp olive oil
2 minced garlic cloves
1 whole lemon, juiced and zested
2 cups sour cream
kosher salt
parmesan cheese
parsley
- Cook pasta in salted water and drain.
- In a skillet, melt the butter and olive oil together on LOW heat.
- Add lemon juice and garlic, then turn off the heat.
- Add in the sour cream and lemon peel and mix to combine and smooth out the cream
- Taste and add salt and pepper if desired
- Add the sauce to the pasta and mix.
- Transfer to a greased baking dish and cover with foil
- Bake in oven for 15 minutes at 350, then remove foil and bake 10 minutes more.
- Remove and sprinkle with cheese, parsley, and more lemon juice.
Notes - I did not have parsley so left it out, also I think this pasta would be great with peas added in. I made this as a side to go with baked lemon Tilapia and it was great. Next time I would like to try and use reduced fat sour cream to see how it tastes
Things have been crazy!
I can't believe its been so long since I've posted anything! Life has been busy, and when I say busy I mean INSANE! I just can't keep up with it sometimes. The kids have had lots of extra school projects and things on top of the daily homework, so my weekdays have been flying by! The sad thing is that I have not had much time to clean, do laundry, or cook. The cleaning and laundry I can do without, but the cooking I have missed. I have been trying to re-focus lately. In my mind body and soul. I have been trying to make some small changes in order to nurture those things. Here are some things I have been trying to do to help me reach a better place:
1. Spend more quality time with the kids
2. Make that time fun and enjoyable
3. Stop focusing on my house being dirty, I cannot help this, and to be honest I'd rather do #1 then clean!
4. Eat better, and I do not mean diet! I mean eat more wholesome natural foods, and cook things myself from scratch when I have the time.
5. Relax! I always need to try and do this more.
So, this past weekend I tried to make some of these things happen. On Friday, I surprised Alex with a sleepover! He has been asking to have a sleepover for months, and with everything that's been going on in out lives, it has just fallen on deaf ears, and I felt bad about that. I realized that its important for him to have play dates and sleepovers with friends. Its the fun part of being a kid! Let me tell you it was hilarious! Now, I did not grow up with around too many boys, so it was interesting to watch them interact. They played rescue heroes, X-men, and star wars. There was also a lot of burping and farting..haha. I may never get used to that!
On Saturday, I took the kids to the Zoo and did the Critter Challenge. It was so much fun and the kids and I really had a great time exploring all the animal artifacts and learning interesting things about snakes and sea lions. For the first time ever, the kids actually wanted me to read the fact boards at each exhibit because they were curious about the animals, now this is new to me, and may be this is reflection of them growing up? In the past they just ran around looking and pointing, but would not stay still long enough to actually chat about anything. I think this is awesome!
All in all it was a great weekend, with no cleaning at all =)
1. Spend more quality time with the kids
2. Make that time fun and enjoyable
3. Stop focusing on my house being dirty, I cannot help this, and to be honest I'd rather do #1 then clean!
4. Eat better, and I do not mean diet! I mean eat more wholesome natural foods, and cook things myself from scratch when I have the time.
5. Relax! I always need to try and do this more.
So, this past weekend I tried to make some of these things happen. On Friday, I surprised Alex with a sleepover! He has been asking to have a sleepover for months, and with everything that's been going on in out lives, it has just fallen on deaf ears, and I felt bad about that. I realized that its important for him to have play dates and sleepovers with friends. Its the fun part of being a kid! Let me tell you it was hilarious! Now, I did not grow up with around too many boys, so it was interesting to watch them interact. They played rescue heroes, X-men, and star wars. There was also a lot of burping and farting..haha. I may never get used to that!
On Saturday, I took the kids to the Zoo and did the Critter Challenge. It was so much fun and the kids and I really had a great time exploring all the animal artifacts and learning interesting things about snakes and sea lions. For the first time ever, the kids actually wanted me to read the fact boards at each exhibit because they were curious about the animals, now this is new to me, and may be this is reflection of them growing up? In the past they just ran around looking and pointing, but would not stay still long enough to actually chat about anything. I think this is awesome!
All in all it was a great weekend, with no cleaning at all =)
Monday, March 7, 2011
These days...
I feel sad more often lately than feeling happy, or not so much happy, but just content. I think its just all the remains of betrayal. Not being able to trust is a horrible feeling.
I read something today that helped me put things into perspective:
"You are just as vulnerable to deceit as the next person, even if it flies in the face of thinking you're special or so special to that other person they wouldn't decieve you. The fact is: it was never about you. Your behavior, whatever it was, didn't make someone lie. That was their choice" From the website - www.holisticdivorcecounseling.com
Wow...well said! I think I need to keep reminding myself that I am not responsible for someone lying to me. I could not have done anything different to make them be truthful.
Some days are just hard.
I read something today that helped me put things into perspective:
"You are just as vulnerable to deceit as the next person, even if it flies in the face of thinking you're special or so special to that other person they wouldn't decieve you. The fact is: it was never about you. Your behavior, whatever it was, didn't make someone lie. That was their choice" From the website - www.holisticdivorcecounseling.com
Wow...well said! I think I need to keep reminding myself that I am not responsible for someone lying to me. I could not have done anything different to make them be truthful.
Some days are just hard.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Turkey burgers?
Last night I tried a new turkey burger recipe. All in all it was pretty good. The kids ate most of it, but I have to say that nothing tops a ground sirloin burger. I did go all out on keeping the dinner healthy with all natural ground turkey on a whole wheat bun with a slice of sharp cheddar, and then steamed broccoli on the side.
The kids actually liked the broccoli more than the burger, which was surprising. Below is the recipe I used to make the turkey burgers:
1 pound ground turkey
1 egg
1 tbsp bread crumbs
1 tsp minced garlic
1 splash of worchteshire
1/2 tsp dried parsley
1 sprinkle each of seasoning salt, salt, pepper, and chili powder
Mix and form into patties. I fried them in my grill pan with a little canola oil.
Now for the toppings, since let's face it can make or break a burger, I added a little mayo, lettuce, ketchup, and pickled jalepenos-YUMM.
If I was not making these kid friendly, I would have diced up the jalepenos and added then right into the burger mix!
I do think I will try these again, and next time experiment with different spices and may be some fresh herbs, like Cilantro, and fresh parsley.
In other news, I have been feeling a little better this week. I am really trying to stay focused on the positive things, and remember that things are out of my control now, so I need to just go with it. Its easier said than done, but I am really trying to live by this!
-Peace out!
The kids actually liked the broccoli more than the burger, which was surprising. Below is the recipe I used to make the turkey burgers:
1 pound ground turkey
1 egg
1 tbsp bread crumbs
1 tsp minced garlic
1 splash of worchteshire
1/2 tsp dried parsley
1 sprinkle each of seasoning salt, salt, pepper, and chili powder
Mix and form into patties. I fried them in my grill pan with a little canola oil.
Now for the toppings, since let's face it can make or break a burger, I added a little mayo, lettuce, ketchup, and pickled jalepenos-YUMM.
If I was not making these kid friendly, I would have diced up the jalepenos and added then right into the burger mix!
I do think I will try these again, and next time experiment with different spices and may be some fresh herbs, like Cilantro, and fresh parsley.
In other news, I have been feeling a little better this week. I am really trying to stay focused on the positive things, and remember that things are out of my control now, so I need to just go with it. Its easier said than done, but I am really trying to live by this!
-Peace out!
Monday, February 14, 2011
Oh its here again...
The dreaded Valentine's day...ugh. I actually thought that this year on Valentine's day I would be all sad and woe is me, but you know what? I'm totally not! All I had to do was think of last year on this day, and how unhappy I was (although I did not know it at the time) that day, and how I felt like my life was in some sort of limbo?
Today, I feel like things are starting to move, super slow of course, but moving in a direction I am starting to be ok with? I read this quote today and it made me laugh:
"This blasted holiday only lasts for one day and tomorrow it will all be behind you like the extra pounds you might have added to your ass if you did have a man in your life to give you that big box of chocolates."
HAHA...excellent!
The thing is, I am quite loved without a man in my life! I received the CUTEST homeade Valentines from the kids! Aubree even snuck a little I love you note in my lunch bag today...I am the luckiest Mom out there today!
Today, I feel like things are starting to move, super slow of course, but moving in a direction I am starting to be ok with? I read this quote today and it made me laugh:
"This blasted holiday only lasts for one day and tomorrow it will all be behind you like the extra pounds you might have added to your ass if you did have a man in your life to give you that big box of chocolates."
HAHA...excellent!
The thing is, I am quite loved without a man in my life! I received the CUTEST homeade Valentines from the kids! Aubree even snuck a little I love you note in my lunch bag today...I am the luckiest Mom out there today!
Friday, February 11, 2011
Taking Care of Myself?
With everything going on lately, the most common advice I get from family and friends is "remember to also take care of yourself". What does that mean exactly? With my days so routine and my life so busy now doing everything on my own, how do I do this? I mean, I get what everyone is saying, but how do I actually accomplish this when I've never put myself first in the past? It's weird for me to think this way and think about what I want and need. May be as the pain of my current situation lessens, I will be better at it? I don't know?
I hope I can get better at doing this for me and the kids. The better state I am in, then the better they are too.
I think I need to start meditiating, or some other activity that will help me clear my mind of negativity, or at least learn to redirect it into something better. I guess this will be my first step towards "taking care of myself". I am going to start researching meditation and Reiki, may be it will help!
I hope I can get better at doing this for me and the kids. The better state I am in, then the better they are too.
I think I need to start meditiating, or some other activity that will help me clear my mind of negativity, or at least learn to redirect it into something better. I guess this will be my first step towards "taking care of myself". I am going to start researching meditation and Reiki, may be it will help!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
My Comic Relief
These days the only thing that gets me through the day are my kids. I live for them, and some days I relay on them to get me out of my own head. Here is a sample of what I get to enjoy on a daily basis...haha
Friday, February 4, 2011
Peace
How do I get there? How do I get past all this hurt and pain I feel on a daily basis and feel some sort of peace? I wish it was easier, I wish I could wake up tomorrow and it will all be gone. The negative thoughts, the constant thinking and rethinking about the same things, the bad things that have happened. How do I make peace with what he has done to this family, and especially to me? There are days when I literally feel like I could lose it. I want to punch something, or just scream for an hour.
Ugh....I could really use a break from all this crap. I feel like its hard to move forward when I'm constantly consumed with hurt, sadness and pain. There are days when I can actually feel the pain, it is there dull and aching, and always reminding me what he has done to me. I hope this will pass....it has to...otherwise I'm not sure I'll make it.
It's just one of "those" days. I feel like lately, I have been having a lot of those days. On days that are better, its like I have this super power to lock those feelings away, and not let them take over. I hope that with time I will be able to lock them away forever.
Ugh....I could really use a break from all this crap. I feel like its hard to move forward when I'm constantly consumed with hurt, sadness and pain. There are days when I can actually feel the pain, it is there dull and aching, and always reminding me what he has done to me. I hope this will pass....it has to...otherwise I'm not sure I'll make it.
It's just one of "those" days. I feel like lately, I have been having a lot of those days. On days that are better, its like I have this super power to lock those feelings away, and not let them take over. I hope that with time I will be able to lock them away forever.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
My Birthday Weekend
For my birthday this year, I decided that I needed to get away for a few days, and where to? To see my awesome, super, perfect friend Tara and her family. T and I met back in college and have remained friends ever since. My sister also came down to meet us and hang for a couple of days. We had such a great time, and I was really able to relax and enjoy my birthday this year. That is pretty rare, since I usually do not do much for my birthday.
Last week was a rough one, so getting away for a few days, and being able to talk about things with T and my sister was so helpful. I realized a few things, like I'm stronger than I think and that I am deserving of much more in this life! I pledged to myself that I will try as hard as I can to see my life in a new way, a different, but healthier way.
While I was in NYC, I had my Tarot cards read for the first time ever. I figured now was the perfect time, when my life is turned upside down. There is not a better time for something like this right? Well, I have to say it was AMAZING! T told me not to tell her anything before or during the reading, so I kept my mouth shut. She was pretty dead on with my past and present. I actually teared up a bit because hearing things like that from a stranger was kind of surreal. My future reading was promising and sounded fulfilled and peaceful, just the way I hope it to be. So, I am keeping those things in mind, but also staying a little skeptical as I move forward, because you just never know how true those readings are.
With all of this is mind, I am going to keep moving forward towards a more positive, peaceful, happy future =)
-Just keep swimming, just keep swimming....
Last week was a rough one, so getting away for a few days, and being able to talk about things with T and my sister was so helpful. I realized a few things, like I'm stronger than I think and that I am deserving of much more in this life! I pledged to myself that I will try as hard as I can to see my life in a new way, a different, but healthier way.
While I was in NYC, I had my Tarot cards read for the first time ever. I figured now was the perfect time, when my life is turned upside down. There is not a better time for something like this right? Well, I have to say it was AMAZING! T told me not to tell her anything before or during the reading, so I kept my mouth shut. She was pretty dead on with my past and present. I actually teared up a bit because hearing things like that from a stranger was kind of surreal. My future reading was promising and sounded fulfilled and peaceful, just the way I hope it to be. So, I am keeping those things in mind, but also staying a little skeptical as I move forward, because you just never know how true those readings are.
With all of this is mind, I am going to keep moving forward towards a more positive, peaceful, happy future =)
-Just keep swimming, just keep swimming....
Thursday, January 27, 2011
A Hair?
Last night while Alex was chatting me up about school and what not, he stops and says "Mom, I think I have my first hair on my chin right here" I look over and he is inspecting his chin with his fingers...hahaha. Then he says "You know that means I have to start shaving right?" OMG! I cannot even begin to think about that...yikes, he is growing up so fast!
It really got me thinking, that these days when I look at him, I cannot believe how much he has matured. He shows his maturity in different ways, like the hair he thinks he feels on his chin and wanting to start his own rock band. I sometimes wonder what he will be like in about 5 years, when he will have to start shaving his face and the possibility of him forming a band are so much more real. It started to make me a little sad to think about him like that.
You know they say there is this "thing" between mothers and sons and I have to say that I get that now. I feel like we have a special bond, and there are moments every now and then that I feel it even more. Sometimes, when he comes home from school, or somewhere else, he will come right in and give me a real tight squeeze hug, and I know he genuinely missed me. Now for those of you who know Alex, you know that he is not the most affectionate kid, and most of the time when he goes in for a hug, he will actually turn the other way and do this kind of "back in for a hug" thing. So, when he throws himself at me with arms open, I know its a special moment between him and I. I pray our bond never weakens and that we can always have these special moments with one another.
-Peace out
It really got me thinking, that these days when I look at him, I cannot believe how much he has matured. He shows his maturity in different ways, like the hair he thinks he feels on his chin and wanting to start his own rock band. I sometimes wonder what he will be like in about 5 years, when he will have to start shaving his face and the possibility of him forming a band are so much more real. It started to make me a little sad to think about him like that.
You know they say there is this "thing" between mothers and sons and I have to say that I get that now. I feel like we have a special bond, and there are moments every now and then that I feel it even more. Sometimes, when he comes home from school, or somewhere else, he will come right in and give me a real tight squeeze hug, and I know he genuinely missed me. Now for those of you who know Alex, you know that he is not the most affectionate kid, and most of the time when he goes in for a hug, he will actually turn the other way and do this kind of "back in for a hug" thing. So, when he throws himself at me with arms open, I know its a special moment between him and I. I pray our bond never weakens and that we can always have these special moments with one another.
-Peace out
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Granola Bars
This past weekend, I took a stab at making my own granola bars from scratch. The thing is, Alex is super picky. One of things he does love are those Quaker chocolate chip granola bars, that are of course loaded with sugar and who knows what else? So, I thought, it cannot be hard to make then yummy and healthier, and I have to say they were a complete success! They turned out soo good, and Alex loves them too - score!!
Here's the recipe I used:
Granola Bars
2 1/4 cups organic rolled oats
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1 tsp cinnamon
1 cup unbleached wheat flour
1/2 cup craisins
1/2 cup chocolate chips
3/4 tsp sea salt
1/2 cup honey
1 egg beaten
3/4 cup all natural applesauce
2 tsp vanilla extract
Mix oats, brown sugar, cinnamon, flour, salt, craisins, and chocolate chips in large bowl. Then make a well in the center, and add the beaten egg, honey, applesauce, and vanilla. Mix well with hands or spoon.
Grease a 9x13 baking dish, and pat the mixture in nice and flat. Bake in preheated oven (350) for about 20-25 minutes, or until the edges get nice and brown, and here's the thing, the longer they cook the crunchier your bars will be, so keep an eye on them and take them out earlier if you like them more chewy.
Once you take them out, let the pan cool for about 5 min, then cut into desired shape. I scooped them out and let them cool on a rack, but they would probably be fine cooling in the pan too!
I just love these bars and have been eating them like crazy! I think I may try and experiment more next time too. I bet they would be good with some nuts and ground flaxseed, or even puffed rice cereal or somehting like that. Make them! You will thank me!
Peace out!
Here's the recipe I used:
Granola Bars
2 1/4 cups organic rolled oats
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1 tsp cinnamon
1 cup unbleached wheat flour
1/2 cup craisins
1/2 cup chocolate chips
3/4 tsp sea salt
1/2 cup honey
1 egg beaten
3/4 cup all natural applesauce
2 tsp vanilla extract
Mix oats, brown sugar, cinnamon, flour, salt, craisins, and chocolate chips in large bowl. Then make a well in the center, and add the beaten egg, honey, applesauce, and vanilla. Mix well with hands or spoon.
Grease a 9x13 baking dish, and pat the mixture in nice and flat. Bake in preheated oven (350) for about 20-25 minutes, or until the edges get nice and brown, and here's the thing, the longer they cook the crunchier your bars will be, so keep an eye on them and take them out earlier if you like them more chewy.
Once you take them out, let the pan cool for about 5 min, then cut into desired shape. I scooped them out and let them cool on a rack, but they would probably be fine cooling in the pan too!
I just love these bars and have been eating them like crazy! I think I may try and experiment more next time too. I bet they would be good with some nuts and ground flaxseed, or even puffed rice cereal or somehting like that. Make them! You will thank me!
Peace out!
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Wahhhhhh...
There are some days when all I want to say is wahhhhh, over and over again. Today is one of those days. Sometimes I wake up and I immediately know its going to be one of "those" days. The kind of days when my mind is consumed with negative thoughts and feelings of sadness, and no matter what I do I can't find my way out.
I have to say that I am usually pretty good at keeping my focus on the good things in my life, so when I start to feel like I'm slipping into a negative state, I can quickly change it. But, sometimes I just don't have the energy for it. Being a single Mom takes its toll after a while. The day to day tasks and doing it all alone. I am not only physically tired, but there is the emotional part of it too. So on "those" days, I have no choice but to give in and go there into the trenches of my mind and hope that it won't last long. My hope is that with time the consuming feelings of sadness go away or at least dwindle. I know I'm not the only person who deals with this sort of thing, and you know who you are.
So, today I'm hoping it won't last long, and that tomorrow when I wake up, I feel better and more like my old self, the one that is strong, happy and more optimistic about life.
Peace =)
I have to say that I am usually pretty good at keeping my focus on the good things in my life, so when I start to feel like I'm slipping into a negative state, I can quickly change it. But, sometimes I just don't have the energy for it. Being a single Mom takes its toll after a while. The day to day tasks and doing it all alone. I am not only physically tired, but there is the emotional part of it too. So on "those" days, I have no choice but to give in and go there into the trenches of my mind and hope that it won't last long. My hope is that with time the consuming feelings of sadness go away or at least dwindle. I know I'm not the only person who deals with this sort of thing, and you know who you are.
So, today I'm hoping it won't last long, and that tomorrow when I wake up, I feel better and more like my old self, the one that is strong, happy and more optimistic about life.
Peace =)
Friday, January 21, 2011
Life Struggles
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about my life and how this past year and half was just so so horrible. The struggles of getting through day to day were so hard on me and really weighed me down. I never realized just how unhappy I was? When you are in a bad situation so deeply it can be consuming, and you cannot see how its affecting you. Eventually you start to lose yourself.
I definitely have lost myself this past year and am slowly trying to rebuild my life one day at a time. I also realized, that everywhere you look, people are struggling with something. The more I opened up to people about my struggles, the more people shared with me their own personal issues and struggles. I also believe that everyone is dealt a whopper of a struggle at some point in their lives. Whether its a death in the family, a separation, bankrupcy, or some other life altering event. I'm hoping that this one is my "big" struggle and that I can get through it in one piece and come out better on the other side. I think this thought process is what gets me through and makes me hopeful for better times.
I know alot of people that have been through some pretty bad life struggles and have made it! This gives me the inspiration to keep going. Recently, I was having a coversation with my Mom and I told her that I believe that people get what they deserve, and when they make bad choices they have live with that, and whatever that brings. She then said "but what about you?" This got me thinking....yeah what about me? May be my true state of happiness is still to be achieved, and that I have not yet met my final match? I don't know? But it is an interesting thing to ponder.
Life can throw you curve balls sometimes...be ready, always acknowledge with your instincts no matter how much it hurts, and always carry yourself with grace.
-peace out
I definitely have lost myself this past year and am slowly trying to rebuild my life one day at a time. I also realized, that everywhere you look, people are struggling with something. The more I opened up to people about my struggles, the more people shared with me their own personal issues and struggles. I also believe that everyone is dealt a whopper of a struggle at some point in their lives. Whether its a death in the family, a separation, bankrupcy, or some other life altering event. I'm hoping that this one is my "big" struggle and that I can get through it in one piece and come out better on the other side. I think this thought process is what gets me through and makes me hopeful for better times.
I know alot of people that have been through some pretty bad life struggles and have made it! This gives me the inspiration to keep going. Recently, I was having a coversation with my Mom and I told her that I believe that people get what they deserve, and when they make bad choices they have live with that, and whatever that brings. She then said "but what about you?" This got me thinking....yeah what about me? May be my true state of happiness is still to be achieved, and that I have not yet met my final match? I don't know? But it is an interesting thing to ponder.
Life can throw you curve balls sometimes...be ready, always acknowledge with your instincts no matter how much it hurts, and always carry yourself with grace.
-peace out
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
I have a dream...
Last night, Aubree says to me "I know about the king..." At first I wasn't sure what the heck she was talking about, but then I realized that in the background on the news they were talking about Martin Luther King. So I said "Oh yeah? Who is he and what did he do?" She says in her cute little voice "He had a dream you know...he wanted the people to stop fighting eachothers because they were all different colors, some light and some dark and he wanted them all to be nice" Isn't that the cutest most simple way to put it?
If only things in life were that simple? I love hearing how the kids make sense of things. You can learn a lot from your kids if you just listen and let them express themselves =)
I also have a dream, and I hope that someday it may come true...until then let's just keep things in life as simple as possible, and never stop dreaming.
-Peace out!
If only things in life were that simple? I love hearing how the kids make sense of things. You can learn a lot from your kids if you just listen and let them express themselves =)
I also have a dream, and I hope that someday it may come true...until then let's just keep things in life as simple as possible, and never stop dreaming.
-Peace out!
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Did I kick you?
Last night as I was getting the kids ready for bed, Aubree asks me "Momma when I was in your belly did I kick you?" She is so cute and soooo curious and loves to ask things like this. I told her "Yes, you kicked me all the time".
I notice with her that when she hears an answer she likes, she will keep going with the questions. So, the next was "Did I cry in your belly?" I was not sure how to answer that one, so I told her "No, babies never cry when they are inside their mommy, they are soo happy and cozy in there, that they have nothing to cry about." She seemed to like that answer too..haha
The next one killed me, she asked "Did I poop and pee inside your belly?" Ummmm, I had no clue what to tell her here? So I eventually said, no, babies don't do that until they come out of their Momma's belly =)
Haha...she is so cute and always has such thoughtful questions!
This coversation got me thinking about both pregnancies, and how awesome it was to have them growing inside me, and how happy I was at that time. It's amazing how fast the time goes and how you tend to forget all those little details. Today, I am going to take some time to think back when they both were born and how I felt on those days, and wonderful it was and how lucky I am to have the most amazing kids in the world! Today, I am truely blessed to be a Mom and am so thankful to have two happy healthy kids. They are my reason to go on with living life to its fullest and to strive for happiness every single day.
-Peace out!
I notice with her that when she hears an answer she likes, she will keep going with the questions. So, the next was "Did I cry in your belly?" I was not sure how to answer that one, so I told her "No, babies never cry when they are inside their mommy, they are soo happy and cozy in there, that they have nothing to cry about." She seemed to like that answer too..haha
The next one killed me, she asked "Did I poop and pee inside your belly?" Ummmm, I had no clue what to tell her here? So I eventually said, no, babies don't do that until they come out of their Momma's belly =)
Haha...she is so cute and always has such thoughtful questions!
This coversation got me thinking about both pregnancies, and how awesome it was to have them growing inside me, and how happy I was at that time. It's amazing how fast the time goes and how you tend to forget all those little details. Today, I am going to take some time to think back when they both were born and how I felt on those days, and wonderful it was and how lucky I am to have the most amazing kids in the world! Today, I am truely blessed to be a Mom and am so thankful to have two happy healthy kids. They are my reason to go on with living life to its fullest and to strive for happiness every single day.
-Peace out!
Monday, January 17, 2011
In love...
With a new chip! While I was browsing the chip aisle at the grocery store, I kept thinking ugh, I wish there was a better chip for you that also tasted good. Then, I noticed Tostitoes new Artisan recipes chips. According to the package, they contain 100% all natural ingredients. So I bought the Roasted Garlic and Black Bean. When I got home I opened that bag instantly and I swear after my first bite I heard music. THEY ARE SOOOOO GOOD! I hate to admit that the bag is almost gone already =)
A Sweet Little Weekend
So, this past weekend was the first weekend I have been alone in the house without the kids. I was not sure how I would feel about it, but I have to say it was pretty sweet! After they left Saturday morning, Mom and I went shopping and were in no rush, which is so nice! I forgot what it is like to shop when you don't have a timeline. After I ate lunch with my parents, I went home and watched a movie in the afternoon...WHOA! I never get to watch an adult movie in the afternoon! It was lovely. I spent Saturday night drinking, eating and laughing with a couple girlfriends...SO MUCH FUN! I really need to do that more.
Sunday was a great day too, after a quick trip to the grocery store, I cooked! I made homeade chicken noodle soup, and was able to freeze a ton of it for lunches and quick dinners. The soup is almost 100% all natural too. I also made banana chocolate chip cookies, which should be renamed to: little banana cakes with chocolate, they are so YUMMM!
Overall, it was nice to relax and think about things without interruptions. I miss the kids terribly when I am not with them, but oh how it is nice to recharge again.
-peace out!
Sunday was a great day too, after a quick trip to the grocery store, I cooked! I made homeade chicken noodle soup, and was able to freeze a ton of it for lunches and quick dinners. The soup is almost 100% all natural too. I also made banana chocolate chip cookies, which should be renamed to: little banana cakes with chocolate, they are so YUMMM!
Overall, it was nice to relax and think about things without interruptions. I miss the kids terribly when I am not with them, but oh how it is nice to recharge again.
-peace out!
Monday, January 10, 2011
Vegan??
So...In my quest to eat healthier and all natural as much as possible, I keep coming across vegan recipes. I'm guessing because the vegan diet consists of mostly fruits, veggies, and grains. It got me thinking about trying some vegan recipes for things that I normally make with eggs and butter. My first attempt was Vegan Cranberry Orange Muffins. The result was interesting. Not super delicious, but not bad either. I think with a few modifications, the muffins could be really good and fairly healthy. Here's the recipe as is with my additional notes below:
Vegan Cranberry Orange Muffins
2 cups all natural unbleached flour
2/3 cup sugar
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup fresh orange juice
1/2 cup canola oil
2 tsp orange zest
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 cup fresh chopped cranberries
1 cup pecans or walnuts (optional)
Mix all dry ingredients, then make a well in bowl and add juice, oil, zest, and vanilla.
Mix till half way moistened, then add cranberries and nuts, then fold gently till just mixed.
Fill muffin tin and bake for about 20 minutes, or until toothpick comes out clean!
Next time, I think I will add more sugar, or even may be 1/2 white and 1/2 brown. I also think I would add more orange zest, and may be even some apple sauce for a binder. My muffins came out moist, but they crumble easily, which is b/c there is no egg added. I will definitely try this one again till I perfect it!
Let me share one more foodie thing today as well. If you are looking for a good meat subsitution, try Gardenburger's Chipoltle veggie burgers, they are awesome with cheese on toast, and very healthy for you!
Vegan Cranberry Orange Muffins
2 cups all natural unbleached flour
2/3 cup sugar
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup fresh orange juice
1/2 cup canola oil
2 tsp orange zest
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 cup fresh chopped cranberries
1 cup pecans or walnuts (optional)
Mix all dry ingredients, then make a well in bowl and add juice, oil, zest, and vanilla.
Mix till half way moistened, then add cranberries and nuts, then fold gently till just mixed.
Fill muffin tin and bake for about 20 minutes, or until toothpick comes out clean!
Next time, I think I will add more sugar, or even may be 1/2 white and 1/2 brown. I also think I would add more orange zest, and may be even some apple sauce for a binder. My muffins came out moist, but they crumble easily, which is b/c there is no egg added. I will definitely try this one again till I perfect it!
Let me share one more foodie thing today as well. If you are looking for a good meat subsitution, try Gardenburger's Chipoltle veggie burgers, they are awesome with cheese on toast, and very healthy for you!
Friday, January 7, 2011
Feeling it...
I am definitely starting to "feel it", the overall sadness and hurt part of losing someone you care so much about. I find that on days when I feel it more and have a hard time snapping out of it, I turn to music. Hearing the right song at the right time can just send me into a better mood, or just make me feel ok with everything that is going on.
This happened this morning completely by mistake. I got into the car after dropping the kids off and started my ipod on shuffle for the 25 minute commute into the office. Then, as I started thinking about things, the perfect song came on and the lyrics were like a journal of my life these past few months. Here is is:
"Between the Lines"
By Sara Bareilles
Time to tell me the truth
To burden your mouth for what you say
No pieces of paper in the way
Cause I can't continue pretending to choose
These opposite sides on which we fall
The loving you laters if at all
No right minds could be wrong this many times
My memory is cruel
I'm queen of attention to details
Defending intentions if he fails
Until now, he told me her name
It sounded familiar in a way
I could have sworn I'd heard him say it ten thousand times
If only I had been listening
Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me
Always between the lines
Between the lines
I thought I thouoght I was ready to bleed
That we'd move from the shadows on the wall
And stand in the center of it all
Too late two choices to stay or to leave
Mine was so easy to uncover
He'd already left with the other
So I've learned to listen through silence
Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me be
You and me always be
I tell myself all the words he surely meant to say
I'll talk until the conversation doesn't stay
Wait for me I'm almost ready
When he meant let go
Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me
Always be
You and me
Always between the lines
"Always between the lines" is an interesting play of words and I like it, I think it sums things up pretty accurately.
Today I will be ok with knowing the truth, and it alone will help me move on.
-Peace out
This happened this morning completely by mistake. I got into the car after dropping the kids off and started my ipod on shuffle for the 25 minute commute into the office. Then, as I started thinking about things, the perfect song came on and the lyrics were like a journal of my life these past few months. Here is is:
"Between the Lines"
By Sara Bareilles
Time to tell me the truth
To burden your mouth for what you say
No pieces of paper in the way
Cause I can't continue pretending to choose
These opposite sides on which we fall
The loving you laters if at all
No right minds could be wrong this many times
My memory is cruel
I'm queen of attention to details
Defending intentions if he fails
Until now, he told me her name
It sounded familiar in a way
I could have sworn I'd heard him say it ten thousand times
If only I had been listening
Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me
Always between the lines
Between the lines
I thought I thouoght I was ready to bleed
That we'd move from the shadows on the wall
And stand in the center of it all
Too late two choices to stay or to leave
Mine was so easy to uncover
He'd already left with the other
So I've learned to listen through silence
Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me be
You and me always be
I tell myself all the words he surely meant to say
I'll talk until the conversation doesn't stay
Wait for me I'm almost ready
When he meant let go
Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me
Always be
You and me
Always between the lines
"Always between the lines" is an interesting play of words and I like it, I think it sums things up pretty accurately.
Today I will be ok with knowing the truth, and it alone will help me move on.
-Peace out
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Working from Home
Working from has to be the best thing since sliced bread. I love that I can stay in my cozy clothes all day and that showering is optional. Although, I do usually shower just to wake up in the morning, but the whole preparing to go in the office activities are not needed. It's amamzing how much time I save when I don't have to put make-up on and look presentable. I also don't have to make a lunch and pack snacks for the day etc. It's a wonderful thing!
Another big bonus for me is that I get to make real food for breakfast and lunch instead of my on-the-go yogurt smoothie, or canned soup. This morning as I was working away at home I had a HUGE craving for good ole oatmeal, Quaker from scratch to be exact. Now let me say that my old way of eating a bowl of oatmeal would have inlcuded butter, milk and lots of white sugar to satisfy my sweet tooth. Today, I tried to re-think how I could make a delish bowl without the crap in it? So, I cooked the oatmeal, then added a bit of skim milk, cinnamon, honey, and a sliced banana, and you know what - it's awesome, and sooooo good, and healthy! I think another yummy addition would be to add some pure maple syrup, or dried cranberries.
So far this year, I'm doing well staying on my eating better kick, which in turn makes me a feel a little better every day.I will try and keep up with my recipe sharing, and will only share the successful ones!
And for my 2 favorite readers so far (you know who you are) thanks for the support, love you both!
Peace out!
Another big bonus for me is that I get to make real food for breakfast and lunch instead of my on-the-go yogurt smoothie, or canned soup. This morning as I was working away at home I had a HUGE craving for good ole oatmeal, Quaker from scratch to be exact. Now let me say that my old way of eating a bowl of oatmeal would have inlcuded butter, milk and lots of white sugar to satisfy my sweet tooth. Today, I tried to re-think how I could make a delish bowl without the crap in it? So, I cooked the oatmeal, then added a bit of skim milk, cinnamon, honey, and a sliced banana, and you know what - it's awesome, and sooooo good, and healthy! I think another yummy addition would be to add some pure maple syrup, or dried cranberries.
So far this year, I'm doing well staying on my eating better kick, which in turn makes me a feel a little better every day.I will try and keep up with my recipe sharing, and will only share the successful ones!
And for my 2 favorite readers so far (you know who you are) thanks for the support, love you both!
Peace out!
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Is Green Tea and Honey Magic?
I swear this is why I have not caught any of the sicknesses that are going around right now. After doing some reading, I found that not only is green tea packed with anti-oxidents, but it can be great for your skin! I also add about 1 tablespoon of honey to each cup because I have a wicked sweet tooth and am trying to cut the refined sugar as much as possible. For about the last month I have had 1-2 cups of green tea a day and so far I am free and clear of sickness!
I also did some research on the benfits of honey and as it turns out honey can be great for acne and acne scars. Who knew? You can actually rub it on your face and use it as a face mask. So because I have been battling some acne myself, I tried it, and so far so good. It does seem to make my face smoother. My routine is wash with the Clinique acne bar soap, then apply the honey for 15 minutes, then wash off with water and apply Clinique Dramatically Different moisturizer, and wallla! Smooth face!
Give it about another 4 weeks to see about breakouts, but I'm willing to keep it up to see if it is magical.
Peace out!
I also did some research on the benfits of honey and as it turns out honey can be great for acne and acne scars. Who knew? You can actually rub it on your face and use it as a face mask. So because I have been battling some acne myself, I tried it, and so far so good. It does seem to make my face smoother. My routine is wash with the Clinique acne bar soap, then apply the honey for 15 minutes, then wash off with water and apply Clinique Dramatically Different moisturizer, and wallla! Smooth face!
Give it about another 4 weeks to see about breakouts, but I'm willing to keep it up to see if it is magical.
Peace out!
Eating Healthier
How do you eat healthy while also satisfying the tastes of kids?? I don't know the answer, but this year I am going to try very hard to eat better and make healthier food that my kids will enjoy too!
I have to say that one of my most favorite foods on the planet is good old homeade Mac and Cheese. I could rotate this meal every other day with Pizza, my other favorite food. But, we all know that mac and cheese is typically high in fat and carbs...=(
The good news is that I found a healthier recipe that includes a veggie in disguise, so stealth that even Alex ate it and loved it. Now that is a feat within itself!
I'll share the yummy recipe here:
Mac and Cheese with Winter Squash
1 pound of elbows or whatever pasta you like
1 12oz. package of frozen winter squash
3 cups fat free skim milk
10-12oz. of any type of cheese you like I prefer montery jack, sharp cheddar and havarti
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. powdered mustard
1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper
Black pepper to taste
Preheat the oven to 350 and coat a baking dish with canola spray.
Bring the pasta to a boil, cook, drain and transfer to baking dish.
Meanwhile, put the frozen squash and milk in a sauce pan and heat on medium low until the squash is incorporated. Then, turn the heat to medium till almost simmering and take off the heat. Add the cheeses, salt, pepper, cayenne, and mustard powder. Once cheese is melted, pour over the pasta and mix.
If you like toppings, then combine 2 tbsp. bread crumbs, 2tbsp. of parmesean cheese, and 1 tsp of olive oil and then sprinkle over top!
That's it! Super easy and delicious!
Peace out!
I have to say that one of my most favorite foods on the planet is good old homeade Mac and Cheese. I could rotate this meal every other day with Pizza, my other favorite food. But, we all know that mac and cheese is typically high in fat and carbs...=(
The good news is that I found a healthier recipe that includes a veggie in disguise, so stealth that even Alex ate it and loved it. Now that is a feat within itself!
I'll share the yummy recipe here:
Mac and Cheese with Winter Squash
1 pound of elbows or whatever pasta you like
1 12oz. package of frozen winter squash
3 cups fat free skim milk
10-12oz. of any type of cheese you like I prefer montery jack, sharp cheddar and havarti
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. powdered mustard
1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper
Black pepper to taste
Preheat the oven to 350 and coat a baking dish with canola spray.
Bring the pasta to a boil, cook, drain and transfer to baking dish.
Meanwhile, put the frozen squash and milk in a sauce pan and heat on medium low until the squash is incorporated. Then, turn the heat to medium till almost simmering and take off the heat. Add the cheeses, salt, pepper, cayenne, and mustard powder. Once cheese is melted, pour over the pasta and mix.
If you like toppings, then combine 2 tbsp. bread crumbs, 2tbsp. of parmesean cheese, and 1 tsp of olive oil and then sprinkle over top!
That's it! Super easy and delicious!
Peace out!
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
This life as I know it...
So here I am trying to make my way through this life as I know it now. This year I am going to try and blog more, and share more things that I am passionate about in life. I'm glad to be leaving 2010 behind, it was a rough one, and I'm finally able to start looking to the future. With this blog I'm hoping to share my thoughts and ideas on parenting, cooking, music, and life in general.
I'd like to start with my 10 most important things I have learned this year:
1. Treat yourself with the same respect you give your loved ones.
2. Make time for yourself in this busy life.
3. Let go of the little things that don't really matter in the long run.
4. Love your kids as much as you can, time goes by way too fast.
5. Try and consume less, things don't really matter anyway, life and experiences do.
6. Surround yourself with people you respect and love.
7. No matter what the perception is, everyone is dealing with a difficult thing in their life.
8. Don't judge people, it's just a crappy thing to do, and most judgements end up being false.
9. Don't give your trust freely, trust is earned.
10. Laugh and have fun, life is too short- this may be the most important thing I learned so far!
Peace out.
I'd like to start with my 10 most important things I have learned this year:
1. Treat yourself with the same respect you give your loved ones.
2. Make time for yourself in this busy life.
3. Let go of the little things that don't really matter in the long run.
4. Love your kids as much as you can, time goes by way too fast.
5. Try and consume less, things don't really matter anyway, life and experiences do.
6. Surround yourself with people you respect and love.
7. No matter what the perception is, everyone is dealing with a difficult thing in their life.
8. Don't judge people, it's just a crappy thing to do, and most judgements end up being false.
9. Don't give your trust freely, trust is earned.
10. Laugh and have fun, life is too short- this may be the most important thing I learned so far!
Peace out.
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